I woke up this morning after a confusing sleep. Getting out of bed, I ducked my head to avoid some near-light-speed particle beams that were swirling around the bedroom.
Tutting gently, I pulled on the dressing gown hanging on the back of the bedroom door and made my way gingerly across the landing, hopping over several mini black holes along the way.
I went into the spare room, making sure to negotiate carefully the eleven dimensions available to me. I tutted once more as the PC switched on and loaded the dickwaddery that is Vista Home Premium. "It's a bit nippy in here, isn't it?" I wondered aloud. Looking at a thermometer that was coincidentally hanging from the wall for the purpose of this story, I noticed that it was about 1 degree above absolute zero.
A number of Higgs Boson-particles clustered around me as I fired up my web browser.
"Large Hadron Collider back up and running!" shouted the first news story I came across.
"I do hope they know what they're doing," I thought, as I swatted some inter-dimensional visitors away with my hand.
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