Blimey O'Riley

I am occasionally aware that the TV is on. I will look up from whatever I'm doing and it will be there, like a one-eyed demon. A malformed demon, clearly; with a square head, no limbs, and one multicoloured, freaky eye. But a demon, nevertheless.

Katie has taken to watching CSI: New York. Apparently there are quite a few different shows in the CSI canon - let me tell you, I can't wait for CSI: Abergavenny to come about. Anyway, until then we have to do with the Big Apple version, mainly because we've been there a few times but also because there's some chap called Carmine on there, the sight of whom makes Katie come all over all unnecessary.

In between cries of, "Oooh, look behind that corpse, didn't we buy knishes there?" or "Isn't that Saks, past that pool of bodily fluids?" I've been able to discern a plot of sorts. I'll be honest, there doesn't seem to be too much variation from episode to episode.

Gary Sinise is cast as Grumpy Bloke. He spends his time growling, mainly at Carmine and some other chap who looks like he's been introduced intimately to a broom handle. Grumpy Bloke doesn't smile, I've noticed.

Then there's Ringlet Woman, who wears a vest - she'll take off her jacket to show this every third episode. Strange Coroner with those glasses that split in half - that's his only trick - and Scientific Guy who will solve the crime with one atom of evidence so they can pull in some scrote and bang him up for life.

But for me, the highpoint was always the theme tune - The Who's Baba O'Riley. It is an excellent tune, even if we only get a few seconds of it. But what's this? The latest season is now showing, and they've gone and farted about with it. The power chords are subjugated and there's what sounds like (shudder) a drum machine of some sort. Wrong. On many levels.

Hear that high-pitched whirring noise? That's Messrs Moon and Entwistle spinning in their graves.