Thursday 26 November 2009

Breakfast in America

I'm mindful that the intended audience for this post may not read it today. They're going to be rather busy deep-frying whole turkeys and doing extravagant things with pumpkin pie.

But in the hope that a few of them might be going somewhere near the Internet, in honour of Thanksgiving Day I am today joining our American readers for at least one meal. And it's breakfast.

Well, of course it's breakfast. It's just gone 6.00am as I write this. I can hardly rustle up cornbread and beans or a Philly cheesesteak, can I?

American breakfast could mean anything from a bewildering array of items. I remember being in a New York diner some years ago and seeing the chap next to me take delivery of a huge plateful of crispy bacon. When he started to pour maple syrup over it, I was thrown into a whole world of sweet/savoury confusion. I was going to interrupt him and point out his obvious mistake before I realised that I was English and We Don't Do Things Like That. But he seemed to like it, and when I tried it myself the following day I was suitably chastened. Score one for the colonies.

So. Let's get started. What is the classic breakfast Stateside? The aforementioned bacon? Eggs Benedict? Something with hash browns? No.

Lucky Charms. An American classic, I'm told. We had to go to a special shop to get these - I hope you acknowledge the effort involved. I have no idea what I'm going to find inside. Let's pour some out and add milk.

Coloured marshmallow pieces! Well, that's not something I see in my breakfast bowl often. This is almost too much stimulation so early in the morning - I'm used to the 'various shades of brown' approach to breakfast cereal. However, on trying a spoonful I'm made aware that this isn't, technically, breakfast cereal. It is in fact a Sugar Delivery System. I'm suitably impressed.

Now, what to wash this down with? Ah, yes.

Mountain Dew - the ideal early-morning beverage of choice! Or 'mtn Dew' if the can is to be believed. This isn't normally sold here either, so that trip to the specialist shop really paid off. Although I'm slightly worried about the fluorescent colour of the drink itself. It has a sort of 'nuclear power plant cooling water' nature about it. Let's have a sip.

Wowser. I love the taste of tartrazine in the morning. That's quite something. And, hang on, here comes the caffeine kick. I need a mirror, I think my pupils will be like pinpricks.

Well, that was my latest American breakfast experience, although I'm not entirely sure it's completely typical. But with the Lucky Charms and the mtn Dew, I think I'm set for the day. I'll be bouncing around all over the place. From sea to shining sea, even.

4 comments:

Rebecca said...

You should have followed everything with a Pop Tart chaser, Johnny Bull!

fatboyfat said...

That would have seen me pushing the Awesome Envelope, I think. I have been trying to find some of those hotdog-type affairs you have on sticks, though.

wineandroasts said...

Oh, Dear Lord. Of all the American foods you could have sampled, why oh WHY did you ingest Lucky Charms and 'Dew? Jeezus, Fabs, are you TRYING to kill yourself?

Mtn Dew is beyond foul. I am convinced it is a byproduct of hazardous waste recycling.

Lucky Charms...not my favorite (I don't actually eat cold cereal) but it is, at least, an American classic along with Count Chocula, Fruity Pebbles and Captain Crunch - who (after 30 years) should have been promoted to Admiral by now.

Anonymous said...

ew...not a fan of lucky charms myself, but my kids seem to like them. well...until they leave the bag open and the crispy marshmallows get stale from all of our texas humidity. then they hate them. understandably.

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