The Creative Crunch - 2008

Global markets were still in meltdown this morning as the Creative Crunch continued to take a hold. The Crunch, which appears to have started in the middle of October this year, has drastically reduced the supply of witty commentary across the planet.

Already, LIBOR (the London Interesting Blog Offered Rate) is at an all time high as the demand for memes, topical stories and pictures of strangers' cats next to slogans about cheeseburgers massively outstrips supply.

In unprecedented scenes, governments across the planet have sought to stabilise supply by pumping billions of characters worth of postings into the system. However, it doesn't appear to have stemmed the tide of rising panic, as customers stare gloomily into Google Reader day after day, to be faced with empty reading lists.

But where have all the bloggers gone? Why, ask commentators, have they disappeared? More worryingly, what if they never come back?

Analysts point to a number of factors. "Perhaps bloggers have simply run out of things to say," suggest some. It is an idea that is gaining traction amongst casual observers.

Others counter that argument, pointing to statistics that suggest we actually passed that horizon years ago. "The blog market is due for a massive correction," they claim. "We've had it too good for too long. The days of easy creativity are past us now. Excuse me while I stock up on tinned beans, bottled water and back-issues of The Economist."

Perhaps the views of bloggers themselves should be sought. "What?" exclaimed one, wearing the international blogging uniform of tatty blue dressing-gown, "Do you really think I was going to do anything meaningful in October? I've got a whole bloody month to fill in November - of course I've been back-pedalling this last few weeks......."